October 19, 2015

"Clear eyes...


"Clear eyes, full heart, can't lose."
-Friday Night Lights


...well if not clear, then for sure a lot less blurry.  Regardless, the result is a full heart.  I've just returned home from a few wonderful days spent in State College, Pennsylvania.  Home of Penn State.  Home of my college freshman. And what has become apparent is this...Thing #3 and I share a visual malady.  We are both far sighted. The further away something is, the better we can focus.  It's the up close and personal that blurs our outlook.  Of course, it took some distance to help us both actually SEE this.



"Sunday Brunch with my Girl"
Allen Street Grill
State College, Pennsylvania
(Samsung Galaxy)


Yep, Thing #3 and I have been known to have a rather contentious relationship on occasion.  Those "occasions" escalated in frequency during those high school years.  One desires closeness, the other yearns distance.  Pushing and pulling.  It's a recipe for tension and clouding one's view of the other.  The Better Half often found himself Switzerland, translator, negotiator, peacemaker, border patrol, and always frustrated. When you are far sighted, it's hard to put things into perspective because sometimes you are just too darn close to the subject.

But a funny thing happened since Thing #3 has taken up residence 3 hours away, in her dorm and new life. Perspective and a clearer focus. It's what happens when you are far sighted and you are given some distance.  The Better Half pointed out the other day "You DO realize that our daughter always talks to YOU now...all those texts and late night phone calls....I get NADA!".  Me thinks Switzerland is feeling a bit lost and in need of a new job description.  Believe me, I can relate to his feelings of abandonment.  Been there, done that, got the frown lines to prove it.

Yes, we had a pretty great few days with a clearer focus while hanging together. I really like this girl.  I've always loved her.  And I'm sure she always loved me.  Mom truth...that doesn't mean we've always liked each other. But with some distance and independence from each other, we now both act and react quite differently.  She is learning lessons both in and out of the classroom.  Many of the same lessons I learned walking that same campus.  So many times I have wanted to say "I told you so!"   Funny how a clearer focus has also given my mouth better judgement by muzzling it. I listen, I nod my head, and I utter those words inside that gleeful head of mine.  But truth is, she is waaaay smarter than I was at her age.  Truth is, she is waaaaay more responsible than I was too.  So I REALLY need to relish those mental "I told you so's" because that's all I got on her!  On the flip side I'm pretty sure Thing #3 sees that I DO know a few things about life afterall, that I AM always there for her, and that not only do I love her but I LIKE her...yes Norma Rae...I really, really LIKE her.

Yep, we can see clearly now.  Distance is our friend.  Personally, I am really likin' the view.  Clear eyes sure gives me a full heart.  Most certainly there are worse things in life than suffering from far-sightedness. Yep...I'm talking about READING GLASSES!







Here's where I "link up" today
  
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6 comments:

  1. Fantastic post! I am making the 25 hour flight to see my little darling turn 18--can't wait. Glad yours is 3 hours away!

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    1. Mine just turned 18 the beginning of the month! Enjoy your visit and soak it all in :)

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  2. This was so lovely to read. My mom and I had a very similar relationship!

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  3. This is so great to hear!! So encouraging as a mom just tip toeing into the high school battle ground. It's hard not to flex the wisdom on the Newbs and I'm learning to let mine navigate her own mistakes. It's so hard not to let go and do those battles when I just have to stick my two cents in. Glad to hear that in the end, the relationships are tight. Please keep sharing your wisdom Obe Wan!

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  4. So enjoyed the chatty dialogue in this post. So honest and open. And what an up close view of that grand coffee. The cake looks rather yummo too (ahem).

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  5. I cannot tell you how much I loved this post. You are as great at creating images and sentiments with words as you are at capturing them in photographs.

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