October 3, 2013

The difference between parents and teenagers...

"Sweet Sixteen"
Thing #3 and the Better Half

It's been ten years since I've had a 16-year-old kid in the house.  But history repeat itself for the third time yesterday when Thing #3 hit the benchmark.  It's been long awaited.  It's been highly anticipated.  She is THE youngest in her class...by quite a bit.  Therefore the last to get her Learner's Permit.  As we drove to the licensing center all I kept thinking was how funny horrible it would be if somehow the current federal government shutdown trickled down to the local DMV!    (Okay, it's a day later and that possibility STILL makes me laugh)

You need a physical, you need an eye test, you need to answer a written test with 18 questions (you are allowed three wrong).  Seriously?  18 freakin' questions with a margin of error of 3 and you can get behind the wheel of a death machine?  Well, Thing #3 emerged with her driver's permit.  But she DID get one question wrong.  And HERE is the difference between being a parent, and being a teenager...

Moi:  I don't think you should drive if you got a question wrong!

Teenager: It was a stupid question!

Moi:  Maybe you gave a stupid answer!

Teenager:  It asked "While driving, if you see children on the sidewalk or curb, what should you assume?"

a.  Children are high intellectual creatures and KNOW the rules of safety..they would NEVAH, EVAH, EVAHHHHHH jump in front of your car
b.  They are morons.  They will jump in front of your car just to freak you out, or because they think it would make for a cool Facebook Status to say "Today I was a hood ornament".
c.  (quite honestly...option #3 doesn't even matter)

Moi:  What did YOU assume?

Teenager:  "I" ASSUME kids are smart.

Moi:  "I" assume kids are MORONS unless proven otherwise....and thank you for proving my point.

I think that is truly the defining criteria to realizing you have morphed from kid to adult, the attainment of that little bit of knowledge "kids are morons and do some pretty crazy sh*t without thinking".  But I do have to give Thing #3 some credit, she didn't even ASK me if she could drive home.  THAT has always been the Better-Half's turf because I assume, and the Better Half KNOWS...I would wind up
jumping out into the traffic resulting in a hood ornament Facebook status message of my own.

Here's where I'm linking up today ..."The Party's On"

Please join me on Sundays for Song-ography.
This week's song title is The Moody Blues "Forever Autumn"


  1. Love this. My mom always says "what's the difference between a teenager and a toddler? The teen can drive..."

    Happy bday to her!!

    1. I agree with her. The similarities between these teen years and the toddler years are just scary.

  2. More power to ya. I did this twice...I was the dmv person, but I put my husband in the car with them. It's nerve frazzling, to say the least!

  3. Oh dear- the conversation you had could have taken place at my kitchen table! Our "thing#3 " will be 16 in January and if possible she would like to start driving immediately if only...1. She needs to be 18! 2. Her parents are soooooo concerned and old fashioned 3. All of the above!
    Good luck and a great birthady!

  4. Well to let her feel better, my Sam turned sixteen last July and just now got his permit. Long story, but moral of the story don't let your husband be in charge of setting up parent taught driving school...just doesn't happen. I held my ground because of course he said HE would do it... (I have about 50% German in me), but he now has it and I will be the one taking him out. I did it with my daughter, I guess I have nerves of steel, or I'm stupid! LOL Of course now he will be eligible in March to get his license after only six months instead of my plan of a year...sigh.

  5. Ha ha ha! So funny. Yes, kids are often morons. Every so often they will surprise you with good thinking. I can't image my daughter behind the wheel. She is super clutz

  6. Congrats to the new (learning) driver!! I'll be there in another 2 years w/ my 'baby'. Wow that seems soon! Don't want to think about that!

  7. Bless your heart for maintaining your sense of humor -- I would be so stressed out having a teenager in the household who drives! Congrats to her for passing the test. :-)

  8. Ha! :)
    Our twin boys turn 16 in a month & change.. They've had their learner's permits since they turned 15, and the countdown is on til they become licensed, independent drivers.
    We've been having similar conversations.. and I don't know yet what I'm going to do once (if) they pass their behind the wheel tests.

    Happy Sweet Sixteen to your daughter!

  9. Happy sixteen to your daughter!
    Where I live, you can get your permit at the age of 15 and then your license at the so-mature age of 16....
    I've learned to close my eyes and pray.

  10. Such a cool story, from Aussie Mum of 1 x 17 year old BOY ~ a whole other level of intelligent life form ~ love him to bits :)

  11. Congratulations on this milestone! I am so grateful to my mother for doing the driving with my son because I don't think he or I would have lived through it.

  12. That's great news! Congratulations ... Keep it cool!! ( I have no experience yet - here you have to be 18 before you get a drivers licence ... so we have 3 years to go :)

  13. Oh boy the fun begins in Ohio you can get your permit at 15 1/2. Happy Birthday to thing#3

  14. I've got a long way to go - and I saw "only" 8 years but I'm not looking forward to it.

  15. hehe....omgosh, you make everything a skit!! my boys are less then one year apart in age. for 3 days in september i had 2 on learners permits and was absolutely sure i was dying in a mustang ;)

  16. Ok this really made me chuckle....


  17. OMG, Kath, this cracked me up! And yes, I've been through it 3 times...not fun at all! Luckily, all 3 of my things have done quite well with Dad as their teacher. The baby is 18, and I still won't ride in the car with either of them. And I still remember seeing a quote somewhere..."hire a teenager while they still know everything"... One day they will understand that MOM REALLY DOES KNOW BEST!!! Hopefully I'll be around when they figure that one out! Great post. Enjoy this glorious Autumn weather! Aloha

  18. I am laughing here - a sick, demented, mentally deranged laugh, but laughing. Our youngest just got his license and now, of course, he KNOWS everything. WTF - Sunday he was in fact a moron, but by Monday evening, he knew EVERYTHING. All because of a slither of plastic between his rear and the seat. Ugh!

  19. Oh Kath, thanks so much for the much needed laugh!!!!! I can't stop!!!!
    I just love your posts ..... and right now I am crying (for my own crazy reasons) and laughing (a million thanks) at the same time!
    Mwah!!!! ROFLMAO

  20. Congrats to your daughter on the Learner's Permit. I remember those days. - Such fun! Just ask my daughter about (black ice)....She scared the heebie jeebie's out of me that morning & I scared her right back.

  21. Gongrats to your `sweet sixteen` ! My little wild child is fortunately only 6 years old, lucky me :)

  22. Not sure how the licencing system works where you are, but we have the 3-level graduated licencing system in Ontario: learner's permit, limited driver's permit, full-blown driver's permit. With the limited driver's permit, a teenager can't drive on highways with speed limits over 90 km/h (55 mph) but once they get their full permit, they can go wherever they want. So, in short, someone who has tried to merge onto a multi-lane highway where cars speed by at 120 km/h can now jump on and go all out. That's scary.